01 October 2010

Please Forgive me

As Christians, there are two types of people we can offend: our brothers (fellow Christians) and our adversaries (non-Christians).  Regardless of who they are, in whatever way we have wronged them, we are commanded to take reconciliatory action immediately (see Mt. 5:23-25).  We are to “go” to that person and apologize, request forgiveness, offer a reasonable recompense…we are to do whatever we can to right whatever wrong caused that person to have something against us.  And we are to do it even if we feel that we did or said nothing wrong or if we feel that what we did or said shouldn’t have offended the other person.  We also must go even if we think that everything is “cool” with the offended and therefore is no need for an apology, simply because the other person may be kind to us or act as if nothing happened (they’ve forgiven you).  The fact is, they’ve been wronged and they’re possibly upset, and that is reason enough to be reconciled to them—it’s not about us or our rights, it’s about obeying Jesus.  So we must “go.”  We may not be forgiven by them, but the important thing is that we’ve obeyed a commandment, not a suggestion, of God, and, upon asking Him, are forgiven by Him.
 
Sometimes the hardest thing to do isn’t apologizing, but forgiving.  We are commanded to forgive and obligated to forgive because the Lord has forgiven us (Mt. 6:14-15; Eph. 4:32; Col. 3:13).  Yes, it is sometimes very difficult.  Maybe someone has hurt you terribly, whether it be physically or emotionally.  Maybe someone said or did things for the sole purpose of hurting your feelings—called you or your loved ones names, talked badly about you or someone you care about, flirted with your spouse, etc., or maybe someone said or did things that they aren’t even aware of.  Guess what?  You have to forgive them, even if they don’t apologize!  And our forgiveness should be unlimited, as God’s is (Mt. 18:21-22).  That’s a tough one.  But forgiving is absolutely not for the offender, it is for you.  

Others’ offenses against us cannot be worse than our own offenses against God, and God has forgiven us much more than we, in our entire lifetimes, will ever forgive.  So why should we not forgive?  It’s all about having a forgiving spirit, which makes us want to forgive, for forgiving without really wanting to forgive is not forgiving at all.  Not forgiving someone (thereby not having a forgiving spirit) can impede our spiritual growth or render our prayers ineffective.  Jesus stresses this in Matthew 6:12, 14-15 and Mark 11:25.  Asking God for forgiveness but not forgiving others is hypocritical.  Having an unforgiving spirit is a sin.  Therefore, choosing not to forgive someone—holding a grudge, keeping the anger, having a vengeful spirit—gives us an attitude that makes it impossible for God to forgive us (Mt. 6:14-15).  Forgiving others is an evidence of salvation and a regenerate heart.  Just as we can love others because God first loved us, we can forgive because God’s forgiveness makes it possible…that is where we get the forgiving spirit, directly from God.  So ask Him for a forgiving spirit.  Only you can benefit from it.

I pray you have a wonderfully blessed day,
Niki (ͼͽ)

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